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15
I used to think that whatever was discovered first was the best.
Later, I realized that's not the case.
The tolerance for great narratives is higher than you can imagine.
At the end of 2022, many friends asked me what to buy.
I told them that ordinary people should just dollar-cost average into the Nasdaq when it dips.
It doubles in five years.
Later, dollar-cost averaging into the Nasdaq became a huge trend at the beginning of 2024 on Xueqiu.
It felt a bit like a bustling crowd, so I withdrew.
Because at that time, I asked some friends for investment advice on mainland assets,
and they all told me to try buying Nasdaq funds.
I was a bit dismissive, thinking they were too damn slow.
I didn't expect that by 2026,
this rule would still apply.
Because there really isn't a better place for money to go. 🤣
I've rambled on so much.
Love you all, see you tomorrow.
0x14bf16f280696ec4431f2579309e865693964444
1.04K
Life is too hard
I hope the Spring Festival Gala has "I love you, how many years old"
Then an invincible spiral pull-up
Then I sell my goods
Enjoy the Spring Festival
0x14bf16f280696ec4431f2579309e865693964444

奶酪Dec 26, 18:31
Let me talk about why I empathize so much with "love yourself."
When I was a child, my family was very poor. Every time I went out, my mother would ask me if I wanted something, and I would shake my head, which led to me having very low material desires as an adult. I consider this a gift that poverty gave me.
Every time I buy something, I can't help but buy the cheaper option; I can't change that habit. I only buy cotton clothes that cost a few dozen yuan, and I always hesitate to spend more. Even though I am in high school now and have pocket money, I could buy something more expensive.
In fact, buying one expensive, high-quality item is more durable than several cheap ones. My friends say this is called long-term consumption, but I can never bring myself to do it.
Later, I understood that this is called "being used to poverty."
Even though I can afford to eat and stay warm now, I still spend a long time studying a few yuan discount coupons.
I am used to being poor; I always think others are more important, always put myself last, and always want others to be well, so I say I'm fine.
Do I have selfish desires? Of course, I do, but I still spend money on others. I am used to being poor.
As a child, I always thought money had a tense relationship; people often say that when you grow up, you should treat your childhood self, but later I realized that it can't be compensated for.
The sensitivity shaped by my family made me feel inferior due to the differences with my peers, and I desperately wanted to have money but couldn't. All of this is deeply ingrained in my bones and heart.
I am very grateful for the love from my parents, friends, and relatives, but love can only be love; love is not money, and love cannot cure my poverty.
I typed and deleted, deleted and typed again. I don't want to complain about fate, yet I feel that God is unfair.
Now, money cannot compensate for my past; I am used to being poor.
Because I am used to being poor, I don't care anymore; being poor has made me brave.
I am someone who is used to being poor, so I have also become accustomed to hardship.
The more money I earn, the less I dare to spend. When I do spend, I think about how this meal will make me work for half a day.
When I earned my first paycheck, I went to eat at that buffet I had been longing for, using a large coupon from Meituan for a weekday early bird lunch. At that time, I ate over 30 plates of meat and didn't take any vegetables, almost making myself sick. I had seen things like sukiyaki and sterilized eggs on my phone before, and looking at the towering plates in front of me, I knew I might not finish them, but I still ordered. Halfway through, my stomach was bloated and uncomfortable, but I still finished eating. It wasn't that good, but I just wanted to finish it, stuffing my mouth as if that would bring me happiness.
The feedback from binge eating was a swollen face, a dry, scratchy throat, and an uncomfortable stomach, but at that moment, the food I chewed and swallowed urgently transformed into satisfaction. This cheap happiness felt like it swallowed all the dreary days.
People suffering from hardship, when they encounter what they consider happiness, are always greedy, wishing to consume everything they love and keep it by their side.
Wearing clothes that cost no more than 200 yuan throughout the year, I became a regular on Pinduoduo. Even if I could afford something more expensive, I would only choose the cheapest to prove my identity, sorting clothes by price from low to high and picking one by one.
I remember once when I was picking clothes with a friend, I tried to say that the cheaper ones looked good, and my friend asked me why I always chose the cheap ones. I said they really looked good (but only I knew I was genuinely concerned about the price).
When I received birthday gifts, I immediately thought about how to repay with an equivalent gift...
I remember last winter solstice, I went to Xijia De to order a plate of dumplings and cried while eating. The dumplings were too small... and the pickled cabbage wasn't sour at all... I just wanted to recall my hometown on the winter solstice. Why, why do you have to deceive me? A plate of dumplings cost me over 30 yuan, and as I ate, I hated myself. I had to work after this meal, I had to; I was punishing myself.
I envied those who said, "I need money."
I am not real enough; I care too much about appearances.
I often can't distinguish between jealousy and envy, too jealous of others living better than me, too envious of others having what I don't. I blame all of this on not having money. If I had a lot of money, I wouldn't have to think about studying hard to succeed. If I had a lot of money, I could feed stray cats until they were full. I hate that I don't have money to live the life I want. When I see the numbers in my wallet, the first thought is not happiness but fear. I fear it will decrease, fear it won't be enough, fear that something unexpected next month will empty it out. This money is like a thin layer of dust; underneath is the bottomless pit I had at eighteen, which can never be filled.
Every time I think about going out to play, I plan for a long time, clearly wanting to go out. But then I think about how my mom will be home alone. And my dad is still out working, and suddenly I don't want to go that much anymore.
Because going out costs money, eating things my parents have never eaten, seeing things my parents have never seen, this lowers my interest in going out and creates a sense of guilt, even a sense of sin.
But this year, I started trying to change myself. I began to slowly learn to be good to myself, slowly not caring so much about my poverty. I started to learn to love myself, to truly love myself. When I saw the term "love yourself," it felt like a deep blow to my heart. It turned out that my previous behaviors were essentially rooted in feeling unworthy of better things. I always thought about giving what I considered better to others but always neglected myself. Therefore, when I saw "love yourself," I cried for a long time. I felt so bad. Why didn't I love myself before? I really want to love myself well. So I started to learn slowly, began to accept my kindness to myself calmly. I started buying myself many good things. At first, I still felt guilty, thinking whether spending this money was too wasteful, that I could do other things for a long time. But I kept learning and looking into the "love yourself" meme, and I found that loving myself is a very simple and good thing. So when I earn money, I reward myself, constantly rewarding myself. Now I feel very happy, invincibly happy, having bought many things I once dared not even think about.
In the end, I still want to say,
Love yourself, see you tomorrow!
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